BEING IN TWENTIES - SOMETHING

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person.

Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out. Send this to your twenty-something friends... maybe it will help someone feel like they aren't alone in their state of confusion...

We call it the "Quarter-life Crisis".

Valentine Blues... वहम

 वहम

 
उसका ये वहम
की बिखर जाऊंगा मैं
और ये अहम्
की उसे फरक नहीं पड़ेगा
सब थी उसको नादानी

सब था उसका भरम

माना टूटा हूँ मैं ,
पर बिखरा नहीं
संभल रहा हूँ,
लेकिन गिरूंगा नहीं

और जनता हूँ मैं ये भी
दावा करे वो कितना भी दुश्मनी का  ,
खुश तो वो भी नहीं है
चाहे जो भी कहे वो
आंखें उसकी सब बयां कर देती हैं




Illusion

Its her illusion
that i will shatter
and ego
of being unaffected
is all her innocence
and all her confusion.

Although I am broken,
but for that matter not scattered
And getting steady
and this time not to fall again.

And I also know
howsoever she claim her hostility,
even she's not happy
and whatever she say
Her eyes just say it all.

Alone at Powai Lake

Standing alone at the promenade of Powai lake,

There are variety of glances that I can take.

At one corner couples are busy in kissing,

And at other, some bullshits are pissing.

And amidst them , I don't know what,

But  something is there, that I am missing.

Is it any company,

or the sense of micturation?

So that like them I can kiss

And piss..

Certainly not, because I know,

Am a loner,but for that matter, not sad..

And can't piss around,

As doing 'IT' publicly, I consider bad..

It is all those unfulfilled dreams

that I had thought once..

Things remained unaccomplished,

And no luck for any kind of bunce.

As I am introspecting my life,

And will surely feel low in some time..

A beggar cum saint kind of person,

reached to a couple busy in their crime..

Guess the beggar is pleading for some money,

Or might be asking for some food.

Couple neglecting him and his vicious voice,

Just increased their intimacy by getting more glued.

"Dude , it is so rude...

And such a bad attitude!!

Give the beggar something and let him go

For some time it will disturb your intimacy although.. "

As I am wishing this for them,

beggar just took a turn with a sad face

And now he is approaching me,

I can see while tying my shoe lace.

As he come near to me

I am getting ready with some money..

But he's asking for something to eat.

I run to get him his food and my own "neat"

The beggar look happy and satisfied

With my thing I am enjoying too..

Feeling happy after helping the old man

Although I am alone , its true!!